Wednesday, February 10, 2010

"Buildings"

Every time I go to say or write the city of "Billings", it takes everything in me not to write or say "buildings" instead. Long story short, Alex's little brother always called it that when he was younger. It cracks me up for some weird reason.

Billings is where I was for over a week after just returning home this Monday. We left on a Sunday, spent seven delightful days with my family, and after staying to root the New Orleans Saints on in the Super Bowl we decided it best to head home and return to the daily grind of life. It was so refreshing to get a change in scenery and have the support from my mom, dad, and sister right in front of me. Alex obviously had to stay here in Missoula and so it was just me and the kiddos. My dad was able to take Monday off, conveniently after Billings received a huge dump of snow, and so it was fun to bundle the kids up and take them outside. Cale was fine as long as "Poppie" was carrying him up on his shoulders and Riley was content as long as she felt like she was helping shovel. I thought they would be thrilled to jump into the snow and throw up in the air but they wanted nothing to do with any of that. It could have been because they were both too bundled up to even move, but we'll just leave that up to speculation.

I needed that week with my parents. Daily life with Cale seems to be getting harder and harder, both emotionally and physically, and although Alex is my rock and the person I go to with everything, he can't be my support when he, too, is hurting in the same way. I think it was nice for him to have a whole week with the house all to himself, not having to be directly involved caregiving for Cale. As for me, my mom always has a way of lifting my spirits and knowing exactly what I need before I do. She makes me laugh and let's just be honest, shopping is way more fun when it's with my mom! My dad has a way of lifting my spirits, too. He has a way of silently letting me know that he loves me more than anything and that he would do anything to make life easier for me. The week was relaxed and filled with incredible food, a little retail therapy, and lots and lots of love and laughter; exactly what I needed after receiving news about Cale and the possibility of him having seizures.

But now we are home and life has continued on just as I had left it. Laundry needs to be folded, bathrooms probably need to be cleaned, Cale returned to school and all of his weekly therapies, and I remain in no better condition than when I left. Things with Cale are still hard and it is, at times, a minute-by-minute struggle to maintain focus and patience.

On a good note, I have the appointments for Cale scheduled in Spokane and Seattle. He will be seen by a neurologist on March 5th in Spokane and then by a gastroenterologist on March 8th in Seattle. At least now I feel like we're doing something instead of just sitting around and watching. For some reason I have high hopes for these two trips. We've seen enough specialists and doctors that I should know better than to get my hopes up because time and time again we leave disappointed and knowing nothing different than when we first came. I feel different this time, though. I feel like we might actually get some answers as to why Cale is having such a difficult time swallowing, eating, and then keeping it in his stomach once it goes down.

My last few posts have been kind of downers but I promise to update you all on something positive next time. :) Both of my kids are growing like crazy and I have so many updates to what they're up to these days.

In the meantime, I hope those who read my blog are doing well. Is anyone else sick of winter and ready for SUN?

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