Desperation

There seems to always be SOMETHING going on with Cale.  I usually choose not to write about it because if I did, this blog would solely be comprised of the "junk" he has to deal with and even though it's important and a huge part of our lives, focusing on what's "wrong" all the time is simply depressing.  I feel the need, however, to write about what's going on with him today because I'm taking him into the doctor this afternoon out of sheer desperation, and perhaps those of you reading this can offer up a prayer.  Or a lot of prayers.

I've watched Cale over the last eight to ten months get progressively worse in regards to his eating and digesting patterns.  It started out with what I just assumed was really bad reflux.  When the medicines he was on failed to work I was naive in thinking that we just hadn't found the right one.  Initial symptoms that I remember noticing were spitting up every now and then, with an occasional grimace on this face when he had to swallow back down whatever had just come up.  Today, however, the symptoms have progressed to Cale throwing up with EVERY feeding, at least once, and then throwing up two to three times in between feedings.  Aside from losing his breakfast, lunch, and dinner, he has seemed to have lost total control over his body during these episodes.  We've ruled out seizures so we know it's not that, but something is going on his little body that is causing these miserable side effects.  He's resulted to laying down when he plays with toys because I think he feels he has more control of his body in that position.  He can still sit up and walk but when he's having these bouts of whatever is going on, he chooses to lay down and be still.  You can clearly hear gurgling and churning in his stomach that is most noticeable right after he eats or has a drink of water.  He cries because he's in pain but thankfully has not refused to eat.  Whatever is going on is causing GREAT stress in our family because we're obviously worried about Cale, but the physical demands of cleaning up vomit ALL. DAY. LONG is getting to the point of being too much bear.  I HATE watching him suffer like this and I HATE even more that I'm not able to do anything for him.

I see what used to be my happy little boy slowly becoming unhappy in his misery.  He's a trooper and has handled this better than anyone I will ever know, but I'm afraid he will soon "give up"; I certainly would have long before now.

We are scheduled to leave for Seattle on June 4 so that Cale can get "scoped" by the GI (gastroenterologist) doctor but at this rate I don't think we can make it that long.  Cale's regular pediatrician is unfortunately out of the office today and tomorrow and so we will be seeing someone today that doesn't know anything about Cale, so please pray for wisdom for this new doctor.  Please pray that they will take my concerns seriously and that he will quickly develop a heart for treating my son.

Our appointment is at 3:50 this afternoon so I will try and update you after we get home.  THANK YOU for praying!!!