Cale has successfully taken twenty-eight independent steps, ALL ON HIS OWN. I realize that is kind of redundant given that is the definition of "independent", but I am so over the moon about this that I can't really say enough to make it seem as HUGE as it really is! AAAAAHHH, I am just so proud of him I can barely contain my excitement!
Seeing him walking three or four steps on his own, don't get me wrong, was incredible in and of itself. There was a time when we thought he would never even be able to do that. Yesterday, though, seeing him walk across an entire room with a grin from ear to ear was enough to make me want to run and down the streets screaming with joy! (Can you imagine? I'm sure the CPS would come to my home and take my kids away!) What was even more incredible than watching him walk was seeing how proud he was of himself. For years now we have seen him try and try and try again, whether it be with sitting, crawling, standing, stacking blocks, walking, etc., etc., etc., and even though he has always been a determined trooper, I think there was always a bit of disappointment and frustration in himself. Not yesterday, though. He was so proud of himself and for the first time I saw in his eyes that he was saying, "See Mom, I knew I could do it!" I was with a group of friends at the time but I'm sure if I was by myself there would have been tears pouring from my eyes.
I'm not naive and I know that twenty-eight steps doesn't mean he will definitely walk on his own someday, but this is the first time I have truly felt and believed that independent walking is a real, achievable goal for him. Trying to be a good mom and an eternal optimist, my prayer has always been for him to walk on his own, but I always left a little room in my heart so that if it didn't happen for him, my heart wouldn't break. I also realize that even if he does learn to walk independently that that doesn't immediately solve all of our problems. Walking doesn't equal cured. Walking, like any other milestone in a child's life, simply opens up so many new doors for him!
I remember when our physical therapist told me to hope for Cale to walk before he was two, but to expect that it may take him three, four, or maybe even five years. I was absolutely horrified and refused to accept that I would have a child that wasn't walking at three years of age, much less four or five. Now, one month shy of his third birthday, I am filled with nothing but pure thankfulness that he is as far along as he is. Learning to deal with and LOVE his disability isn't dependent on the milestones he reaches or the new skills he acquires. Going back to that day when I would have rather checked out and given up after hearing the news that Cale may never walk, and even if he did, it might not be until he's five years old, and then seeing how far we've come as a family to accept Cale and love him even more because of his disability, has taught me that our family is much more capable of weathering the storm than we ever thought we could be.
It's kind of funny to see how God responds when he hears his children say, "I can't do this. I would rather die than have to deal with this." I'm sure I'll have more moments in my lifetime when I find myself saying those words again, but hopefully I will have learned by then that "yes, yes I can".
God will always and faithfully pull us through.
2 comments:
HURRAY FOR CALE! And you, my sweet friend, are a champ. I'm celebrating for both of you!
28 is my new favorite number!
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