Here comes the comic relief!

Comic relief: that is the best way for me to explain the personality of my dear, sweet baby girl. Cale brings a certain amount of seriousness to our lives and although he is incredibly sweet and can even bring on bouts of belly laughter, he is sure to sprout grey hairs upon my head far sooner than I would like. Riley, however, is just plain hilarious. Watching her grow has been one of the best experiences of my life and I literally look forward to each and every day with her. (well, most of the time)

She is coming up on nineteen months of age and I already cannot remember life when she was not with us; it feels like she's been a part of our family since the beginning of time. I remember fretting and obsessing over when and if she was reaching her milestones at the appropriate age but now I have let go of those worries and come to realize that she is completely normal - whatever that means. She has let me experience what raising a typical developing child is like and for that I am so grateful. Watching her move and learn how to do things on her own has engrained in my mind even more how genius God is to make us the way He does. Amazing, simply amazing.

Riley loves almost anything that requires her to move. She is always on the go and I swear if she didn't eat as much as she does she would be as thin as a toothpick. She likes to run, dance, and is just now experimenting with how to jump. Running back and forth on the couch will entertain her for hours. She is mastering her voice and learning to form words. She will repeat almost anything I ask her to but sometimes it comes out in a completely different language. Alex and I put a small amount of effort into teaching her sign language when she was about six months old but didn't push her too much. Now, however, she communicates more through sign language than actual words and Cale has been her biggest teacher. She watches him intently and mimics his interpretations of signs. It's incredibly cute and I'm thankful she's picked up on it so that she can better communicate with him later on down the road. She is the best little sister I could ever dream up for him. She knows how far she can go when wrestling with him and is, for the most part, very gentle. She shows incredible patience for a toddler who thinks the world belongs to her. She loves to be the center of attention and is most content when she knows all eyes are on her. Alex and I, however, do nothing to cut down her ego and are completely smitten.

Riley is quickly becoming a little girl and it's hard to believe it has been almost two years since we brought her home. I remember feeling so overwhelmed and as if life would never be "easy" again, but now I can honestly say she has only brought joy and love to our lives. I love having a daughter and dressing her up and doing her hair. I also love the fact that just like Cale is an exact replica of Alex, Riley is a true mini-me. For once people can safely assume she belongs to me. :)

Serious with a side of comic relief

I promised I would write something more positive and uplifting and so here is me keeping with my promise!

Cale and Riley...Riley and Cale. Those two little bundles of joy have a way of making my life miserable and delightful all at the same time. I mean that in the best way of course. Each have their own and very different personality, both which just upon thinking of them bring a huge smile to my face. I cannot even begin to fathom my life without my two kids...how boring it would be.

I'll start with my little man. Cale is definitely the more serious of the two. He certainly has his silly moments and can always enjoy a good laugh, but I can almost guarantee that years from now he will be the one who dreams up some new techno gadget. He will do almost anything to get his hands on a cell phone, computer, iPod, wires, the vacuum cleaner, zippers, the TV, and pretty much any kind of button that screams out his name. He will play with a normal kid toy if worst comes to worst but his preference is definitely all things "not suitable for children". He is obsessed with how things work and will not give up until he sees it for himself. For example, last summer Alex was repairing one of our sprinkler heads in our front lawn and once Cale saw him pull it up from the ground, it was love at first sight. He NEEDED to get his hands on that sprinkler head and see for himself how it sprung up and down, twisted and turned. Life could not go on until that happened. Another example, most kids love flashlights because they can shine the light wherever they please. Not Cale. He loves flashlights because you can turn the bottom and see where the batteries go. Cale also loves train sets but not because it's fun to watch the train go 'round and 'round the track. He loves trains because it's fun to see how the pieces of track fit together. I used to get irritated that he wouldn't play with toys in the way they were intended but now I think I'm on my way to just embracing it and hoping that maybe one day he's the one to find the cure for cancer.

Cale is also becoming a champion at independent walking. He's even started to think about navigating steps on his own! We're not quite at that level but the fact that he's getting brave enough to try is a huge accomplishment. He's getting faster and sturdier and just last night he was romping around the gym floor at our church with a full-size basketball in his hands. Now that's what I call coordination! Walking has given him more confidence to play with other kids and it is amazing to see him right there with all the others.

I know most kids have this label but I like to think that Cale is the best: he is a SPONGE! Sometimes I think he is learning signs faster than I am! I'm not sure how many signs he has but he has enough to effectively communicate most of his needs. He knows the signs for all of his colors and even though I think he's a bit color blind like his daddy, he knows all of his colors, too! He can tell me how old he is by using his other hand to hold down two of his fingers so that only three stand up. He is quickly mastering his vowel sounds which hopefully means he will be able to say actual words soon. Right now he can say "dada" and "poppa" and although I wish "momma" was somewhere in there, I'm so proud of him. He loves school and very half-heartedly gives me a wave good-bye when I drop him off. I'm pretty sure if he could talk he would be rubbing in the fact that he gets to go to school and Riley doesn't.

I love Cale so much but the thing I think I love most about him is his sensitivity. Not that this ever happens, but if Alex and I are arguing Cale gets extremely upset and starts to cry, which means that Alex and I can never argue for too long. I like to think of Cale as our mediator. If Riley is upset and crying, Cale is the first one to find her favorite blanket and bring it to her. If Cale ever sees that I'm crying he will come over and give me a big hug. He loves to give kisses whenever asked and if he's in the right mood, he'll even scratch your back for you. He hates conflict and so if he's playing with a toy and Riley is crying because she wants it, he doesn't hesitate for a second to give it to her. (which by the way is doing nothing to help Riley learn that she can't have whatever she wants) His personality is so sweet...

I could go on and on about Cale but I suppose I should leave it at that. I meant to include Riley in this post but I guess I'll save her for another one. For all the worry and stress that Cale's disability has brought to my life, the love and joy he brings trumps it all. What I wouldn't do for my little man...

"Buildings"

Every time I go to say or write the city of "Billings", it takes everything in me not to write or say "buildings" instead. Long story short, Alex's little brother always called it that when he was younger. It cracks me up for some weird reason.

Billings is where I was for over a week after just returning home this Monday. We left on a Sunday, spent seven delightful days with my family, and after staying to root the New Orleans Saints on in the Super Bowl we decided it best to head home and return to the daily grind of life. It was so refreshing to get a change in scenery and have the support from my mom, dad, and sister right in front of me. Alex obviously had to stay here in Missoula and so it was just me and the kiddos. My dad was able to take Monday off, conveniently after Billings received a huge dump of snow, and so it was fun to bundle the kids up and take them outside. Cale was fine as long as "Poppie" was carrying him up on his shoulders and Riley was content as long as she felt like she was helping shovel. I thought they would be thrilled to jump into the snow and throw up in the air but they wanted nothing to do with any of that. It could have been because they were both too bundled up to even move, but we'll just leave that up to speculation.

I needed that week with my parents. Daily life with Cale seems to be getting harder and harder, both emotionally and physically, and although Alex is my rock and the person I go to with everything, he can't be my support when he, too, is hurting in the same way. I think it was nice for him to have a whole week with the house all to himself, not having to be directly involved caregiving for Cale. As for me, my mom always has a way of lifting my spirits and knowing exactly what I need before I do. She makes me laugh and let's just be honest, shopping is way more fun when it's with my mom! My dad has a way of lifting my spirits, too. He has a way of silently letting me know that he loves me more than anything and that he would do anything to make life easier for me. The week was relaxed and filled with incredible food, a little retail therapy, and lots and lots of love and laughter; exactly what I needed after receiving news about Cale and the possibility of him having seizures.

But now we are home and life has continued on just as I had left it. Laundry needs to be folded, bathrooms probably need to be cleaned, Cale returned to school and all of his weekly therapies, and I remain in no better condition than when I left. Things with Cale are still hard and it is, at times, a minute-by-minute struggle to maintain focus and patience.

On a good note, I have the appointments for Cale scheduled in Spokane and Seattle. He will be seen by a neurologist on March 5th in Spokane and then by a gastroenterologist on March 8th in Seattle. At least now I feel like we're doing something instead of just sitting around and watching. For some reason I have high hopes for these two trips. We've seen enough specialists and doctors that I should know better than to get my hopes up because time and time again we leave disappointed and knowing nothing different than when we first came. I feel different this time, though. I feel like we might actually get some answers as to why Cale is having such a difficult time swallowing, eating, and then keeping it in his stomach once it goes down.

My last few posts have been kind of downers but I promise to update you all on something positive next time. :) Both of my kids are growing like crazy and I have so many updates to what they're up to these days.

In the meantime, I hope those who read my blog are doing well. Is anyone else sick of winter and ready for SUN?