Dads

Alex and I are doing a marriage bible study up at our church following a book called Staying Close by Barbara and Dennis Rainey.  This is the first time in five years that Alex and I are both free during the Sunday School hour.  In previous years we've either helped with the youth or had too little of kids.  Now that both Cale and Riley are old enough to be in their own Sunday School class and Alex and I are taking a break from helping with the youth, we decided it would be fun to finally do a class together.  I'd have to say that this particular class was perfect for us to get involved with because it's challenged us to talk through difficult things, especially during times when we really didn't want to talk to one another.  Does anybody else fight with their spouse more than usual on Sunday mornings?  I don't know what it is about this day that puts me on edge, but the task of getting out of the house on time pushes a button in my brain that must read, "Every little teeny tiny thing about your spouse will annoy you today."  Not all Sundays are like this, of course, but a good portion of them turn out to be the most stressful day of the week.  Being involved in this marriage study has really made me feel foolish for being such an old hag.

This week the book talked about the role that mothers and fathers play in their children's lives.  The chapter about mothers made me feel incredibly inadequate and a complete failure as a mom, but maybe I'll talk about that another day.  The chapter about fathers, however, really made me thankful and appreciative for Alex, but maybe even more so, for my own dad.  I've known for quite a long time that I have an amazing dad, but somehow our group's discussion brought out a whole new respect I have for him.  I'm so thankful that I've never had to doubt for one split second that I was loved by my dad.  He was always involved in my life but the things I remember the best are him coaching my softball teams year after year and then his captivating interest in my golf game.  He volunteered to take ten-year olds golfing on Tuesday mornings, which could not have been easy because I'm sure as a ten-year old I just duffed the ball around and didn't pay any attention to the rules.  Painful to watch, I bet.  When I turned old enough to get involved in tournaments, he was ALWAYS there.  In high school my favorite memory  was being told by my mom that he elbowed people out of the way to see my score on the scoreboard.  He was shameless for me and words are not sufficient enough to tell you how loved that made me feel.  When we would go hiking in the summers I remember him getting so mad at me and my sister for getting too close to white water rivers.  Looking back, I now realize he got as mad as he did because he wanted to protect us.  He always wanted the best for us, no matter what that looked like.  He encouraged me in everything I did and praised me for all good things.  He got us first and last day of school presents every year, even through college.  He continues that tradition with Cale and I love it!  Aside from loving me, though, I'm most thankful for how he loves my mom.  They are coming up on their 28th wedding anniversary and now that I'm older I've realized that almost every security I had as a kid was due to the fact that my parents loved each other and stayed together.  He's a hard worker and has made incredible gains at work, most of which I probably don't even know about, but no matter how important work was to him, he always made time for his family and that was evident throughout my entire childhood.

Dads are so important in a little girl's life and I can't wait for Riley to get a little older when she starts to realize how great of a dad she has.  Alex is already talking about taking her out on dates and showing her that she's the most important girl in the whole world.  I just know that Riley will feel the same way about Alex as I do about my dad.  I'm so thankful that I married a man who can be that for Riley.  On the way home from running errands the other night, Riley saw the moon up in the sky and told Alex that she wanted it.  I could see the twinge of pain in his eyes when he had to tell her he couldn't.  If it were possible, I'm sure he would spend the rest of his life trying to get her the moon.

I love you, Dad.